You’re So Brave

This post really has nothing to do with lupus or celiac or food but I feel like sharing.

I was going to wait and write about this later in the year when I’m on the ‘other side’ of it but it’s kinda relevant this month so here goes…

I’m in my early 40’s and my hair is 75 % gray.

I started going gray in my early twenties and started coloring when I was 22.   In those early years I rarely went a full 4 weeks without coloring.  As soon as the gray was visible…I hit the bottle. 😉

Much of my 30’s was spent in crazy lupus h3ll but even then I’d still color as often as possible.  Over the last 2 years I started reacting to the dye in various terrible ways but still kept up the dying…just a little less often.  About every 8 weeks instead of 4.

This past December I had the most awful reaction to my pre-Christmas coloring.  My breathing and coughing was so bad the first night I almost went to the ER.  I also had a bad skin rash type reaction that still hasn’t completely healed.  All of that from a little bottle of dye.

I decided right then that I couldn’t put myself through that anymore.  I’ve got enough health problems that I can’t do anything about I shouldn’t be making myself sick on top of it.  For nothing more than vanity.

I was scared at first but it’s really been one of the most empowering experiences.

Empowering except for the multi colored mess it became as it grew out.  I still have some of my natural dark brown mixed in with the gray.  So I had two natural colors going on…gray / brown…plus the remaining dyed ends which after five months (the last time I colored) were this awful washed out bronze-y brown ‘mess’.

For the first few months I just had my stylist take a 1/4 inch off each month but yesterday I went full on Jamie Lee Curtis



and had her cut off all the remaining dye.

In December…after it’s been a full year of no dye plus I have a year of growth…I’m going to do a before / after post here with pics and tips and stuff.

I couldn’t stand looking at the ‘mess’ one more second so going in I’d already steeled my resolve and knew that no matter how short it had to be I was going to leave with nothing more than my natural growth.  I was scared but ya know what?  It’s actually not that bad.  It’ll be easy to handle in the hot South Texas summer heat and now I don’t have to look at the multi colored mess that it was before.  I’m going to grow it back long.

While I was getting it cut a little grandmotherly lady was getting her weekly ‘do’ and she leaned over and said “You’re so brave.”

Ummmm no sweet little lady.  Brave is running into a fire to save a child.  I’m just going gray. 🙂

But seriously what a sad comment on vanity…that a woman is seen as brave for nothing more than rocking her natural hair color?

Rock it I will though. 🙂

It’s been an adjustment but I can honestly say…I don’t miss the bottle one bit.  It made me feel like I was coughing up a lung and no matter how good a dye job everybody knows you dye your hair the second the smallest root shows up.  This has been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made and I have no intentions of ever going back.

May happens to be Go Gray in May month for brain cancer awareness.  I know it’s also lupus and celiac awareness month and I haven’t really done a good a job here of focusing on awareness.  But ya know what…the blog just in its theme alone brings awareness to both all year long.  And to me a child suffering from brain cancer is so much more important than my 40 something year old self suffering from lupus or not being able to eat bread so I’m going to use my awareness post this month to draw attention to this cause. 🙂

44a48e0df500418dec80d6e733f164acChildren’s Brain Tumor Foundation


Happy summer kickoff weekend from me and my sometimes fake boyfriend Kid Rock. 😉

See y’all on Tuesday.  🙂


6 responses to “You’re So Brave

  1. Thanks for sharing! I loved this post because while I had vaguely recall hearing that it was Brain Tumor Awareness Month, I hadn’t heard about Go Gray for May. And, it’s a great cause too! 😀

    Now, it’s amazing how much our society focuses on hair color. One of my good friends started going gray at 13, and (as you would expect) began dying her hair back then. On the other hand, my grandmother’s hair naturally went to a pure white. You would not believe how many compliments she would receive. It was a good deal for her because she doesn’t dye it and it’s accepted by society. But, I wish that it was that way for everyone, no matter what their natural hair color turns out to be!

  2. Thank you so much for reading this post, Kaila. 🙂 I worried that people would think it was silly. I bet your grandma’s hair is gorgeous. Ever since I started this process of no dye I’ve been looking at other gray haired women and it really can look beautiful. Once I got past the idea that as soon as you go gray you might as well check yourself into a home I was able to see how pretty natural hair really is.

  3. Love it! My sister started going gray in her early twenties and NEVER died her hair. Now after 40 odd years, it’s a beautiful blue-grey colour and looks fantastic.

    • Thanks so much for reading this one, gf and me. 🙂 I bet your sisters hair is gorgeous. I’m noticing that my skin tone looks so much better with natural hair even though the natural hair is gray. I wish I would have given up the dye a lot sooner. Could have saved myself a lot of breathing pain.

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